כ'האב זיך אפגערעדט צו מיין דיין אז 12 טעג (אדער 11 טעג לויט די ספרדים) איז צו פיהל פאר מיר.
כ'בין מפרסם זיין ענטפער אהן זיין נאמען ווייל ער האט עס גענטפערט פאר מיר פריוואט.
די ציהל פונעם שנירל איז צו אויפמערקזאם מאכן אז שבעה נקיים קען מען טוישן פאר סתם שבעה ימים און ס'הייבט זיך אהן ווי נאר זי ווערט א נדה
(כ'מיין אז ס'געהערט נישט אין מאחורי, אויב יא ביטע ריקן אהין)
This is a really important and personal question, and I want to give you a clear and respectful overview so you can make your own decision, knowing the facts. One of the most powerful principles in Torah is that we all have free will, and every person is on their own journey. The goal is to be informed, and then do the best you can.
So here’s the reality when it comes to the laws of Niddah and the waiting period:
1. The 7 Clean Days – What Are They?
The seven clean days (shivah neki’im) are a rabbinic obligation, not a Torah law. They were based on a stringency that women took upon themselves in ancient times, when issues of ritual purity (tumah v’taharah) were crucial—because people were eating kodashim (sacrifices) and terumah (priestly food). Even though those aren’t relevant today, the minhag (custom) of keeping seven clean days became widespread, and the rabbis eventually made it binding.
But it’s still important to know that it’s not from the Torah directly.
2. What Is the Torah Law?
According to the Torah, a woman who is a niddah (not a zavah) waits seven days total from when she first starts bleeding. She doesn’t need seven clean days—she just needs to be clean by the end of day seven. Then she can go to the mikveh that night. So if her period lasts, say, three or four days, and she’s clean by day seven, she’s ready. That’s Torah law.
But again, because of the later rabbinic stringency, we follow a second set of rules, described below.
3. Sefardi vs. Ashkenazi Customs
There are two major approaches:
•Ashkenazim always wait five full days from the last time they were together, no matter how short the period is. After that, they can do a hefsek taharah and begin the seven clean days.
•Sefardim follow the original halacha more closely. They wait up to four days, depending on the situation. For example, if the couple hasn’t been together in a few days before the period started, and the bleeding only lasts two or three days, they might be able to do the hefsek on day three. That means fewer total days before mikveh.
So if you’re looking to minimize the wait, the Sefardi system is more flexible—but it has to be done right. Any Ashkenazi is welcome to follow the Sephardic custom.
4. Bottom Line
From a halachic point of view:
•You must wait until the bleeding stops.
•Then you need to do a hefsek taharah—a check to confirm she’s clean.
•Then, according to the standard approach accepted for centuries, you count seven clean days.
•After that, mikveh.
But remember: This whole system is meant to elevate, not to punish. It’s here to bring holiness and strength to your marriage.
That said, if it’s overwhelming, start with what you can do. That’s the real key. No one is here to judge. Halachah has many layers—Torah law, rabbinic enactments, customs—and it’s always better to take on what you understand and feel ready for. If you want to explore leniencies or alternate paths within halachah, feel free to ask.
כ'בין מפרסם זיין ענטפער אהן זיין נאמען ווייל ער האט עס גענטפערט פאר מיר פריוואט.
די ציהל פונעם שנירל איז צו אויפמערקזאם מאכן אז שבעה נקיים קען מען טוישן פאר סתם שבעה ימים און ס'הייבט זיך אהן ווי נאר זי ווערט א נדה
(כ'מיין אז ס'געהערט נישט אין מאחורי, אויב יא ביטע ריקן אהין)
This is a really important and personal question, and I want to give you a clear and respectful overview so you can make your own decision, knowing the facts. One of the most powerful principles in Torah is that we all have free will, and every person is on their own journey. The goal is to be informed, and then do the best you can.
So here’s the reality when it comes to the laws of Niddah and the waiting period:
1. The 7 Clean Days – What Are They?
The seven clean days (shivah neki’im) are a rabbinic obligation, not a Torah law. They were based on a stringency that women took upon themselves in ancient times, when issues of ritual purity (tumah v’taharah) were crucial—because people were eating kodashim (sacrifices) and terumah (priestly food). Even though those aren’t relevant today, the minhag (custom) of keeping seven clean days became widespread, and the rabbis eventually made it binding.
But it’s still important to know that it’s not from the Torah directly.
2. What Is the Torah Law?
According to the Torah, a woman who is a niddah (not a zavah) waits seven days total from when she first starts bleeding. She doesn’t need seven clean days—she just needs to be clean by the end of day seven. Then she can go to the mikveh that night. So if her period lasts, say, three or four days, and she’s clean by day seven, she’s ready. That’s Torah law.
But again, because of the later rabbinic stringency, we follow a second set of rules, described below.
3. Sefardi vs. Ashkenazi Customs
There are two major approaches:
•Ashkenazim always wait five full days from the last time they were together, no matter how short the period is. After that, they can do a hefsek taharah and begin the seven clean days.
•Sefardim follow the original halacha more closely. They wait up to four days, depending on the situation. For example, if the couple hasn’t been together in a few days before the period started, and the bleeding only lasts two or three days, they might be able to do the hefsek on day three. That means fewer total days before mikveh.
So if you’re looking to minimize the wait, the Sefardi system is more flexible—but it has to be done right. Any Ashkenazi is welcome to follow the Sephardic custom.
4. Bottom Line
From a halachic point of view:
•You must wait until the bleeding stops.
•Then you need to do a hefsek taharah—a check to confirm she’s clean.
•Then, according to the standard approach accepted for centuries, you count seven clean days.
•After that, mikveh.
But remember: This whole system is meant to elevate, not to punish. It’s here to bring holiness and strength to your marriage.
That said, if it’s overwhelming, start with what you can do. That’s the real key. No one is here to judge. Halachah has many layers—Torah law, rabbinic enactments, customs—and it’s always better to take on what you understand and feel ready for. If you want to explore leniencies or alternate paths within halachah, feel free to ask.
לעצט רעדאגירט:
